Is Hell Exothermic or Endothermic?
June 3, 2007
So, at this college there was an extra credit question “Is Hell Endothermic or Exothermic?”.
This is what one kid wrote:
First, we postulate that if souls exist, then they must have some mass. If they do, then a mole of souls can also have a mass. So, at what rate are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls leaving? I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for souls entering hell, lets look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to hell. Since, there are more than one of these religions and people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all people and all souls go to hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in hell to increase exponentially.
Now, we look at the rate of change in volume in hell. Boyle’s Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in hell to stay the same, the ratio of the mass of souls and volume needs to stay constant. So, if hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter hell, then the temperature and pressure in hell will increase until all hell breaks loose (i.e.,Hell is exothermic).
Of course, if hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in hell, than the temperature and pressure will drop until hell freezes over (i.e.,Hell is endothermic). So which is it?
If we accept the postulate given by Ms.Therese Banyan during my freshman year, “That it will be a cold night in hell before I go out with you,” and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having a relationship with her, the second case cannot be true. Therefore, hell is exothermic.
The kid was the only one who got credit
Extra Credit
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University bans Student Masturbation
May 31, 2007
Durham University has banned Masturbation in showers in dormitories. The University is based in the U.K. Check out the notice placed by the University’s Estates and Buildings director prohibiting Masturbation in the showers
Student Scores a 0/100 in a Test
May 31, 2007
His professor sent him an e-mail the following day:
If you liked this article, click here to buy me a beer!The Worst College Mascot EVER
May 16, 2007
and yes … it has a name. GeoDuck is the name of the worst college mascot ever .. period and the honor goes to Evergreen State College in Olympia, WA
According to their Athletics page,
The geoduck is mollusk native to the Pacific Northwest. The geoduck (pronounced “GOO-ee-duck”) is the largest burrowing clam in the world, weighing in at anywhere from one to three pounds at maturity. The appearance of geoduck’s large, protruding siphon has led to the belief that the geoduck has the properties of an aphrodisiac. The geoduck has a life expectancy of up to 150 years with the oldest recorded at 163 years.
Oh, there is a GeoDuck fight song too.. I hope they don’t have a Football team there.
Go, Geoducks go,
Through the mud and the sand,
let’s go.
Siphon high, squirt it out,
swivel all about,
let it all hang out.Go, Geoducks go,
Stretch your necks when the tide
is low
Siphon high, squirt it out,
swivel all about,
let it all hang out.
Ok .. ok I won’t hold it off much longer .. here goes the GeoDuck, the worst College Mascot EVER ….
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Buying Homes for College Students
May 4, 2007
According a recent survey, more than 90% of college students live on campus in their Freshmen and Sophomore years. Part of the reason for this huge percentage is that most colleges make it mandatory for incoming freshmen to take up housing on campus. If you wish to move to cheaper off-campus housing, again colleges have a minimum number of credits you need to have before moving out.
Why would Students want to move off-campus?
The biggest reason $$$. According to the College Cost Book, a publication of the College Entrance Examination Board, the cost of room and board runs anywhere from about $4000 a year to about $14000. The higher the cost of room and board, the greater the incentive to find a cheaper alternative. Moreover, some colleges campuses have no housing, others have little and still others have space that may be noisy or unsatisfactory in other ways. And the prospect of tax benefits, especially for parents in a high income bracket helping out their college bound children, may also be a consideration.
Another benefit of having your home is that you need not worry about pesky landlords, telling YOU how neat your house should be, can or CANNOT look etc. You can decorate or paint your house, whether it is bright Pink or the colors of your Favorite NFL team without having the landlord freak out on you.
Assume you are interested in a $60,000, one-bedroom cooperative apartment. A 25 percent down payment, would require the buyer to come up with $15,000 in cash. Assume that the developer is helping with the financing, and a $45,000 mortgage can be obtained at 12 percent interest. Monthly mortgage payments will work out to $463 on a 30-year loan. Add $300 a month for maintenance charges and the total comes to $763.
Maybe another student can share the apartment and pay some rent. If the other student paid $400 a month, the cost to the buying student would be $363 a month.
Tax breaks also become an important calculation. Initially, all the mortgage payment, and perhaps as much as half of the maintenance - for a total of $613 - would be tax deductible. Hence, in a 50 percent tax bracket, the parents would have a $306 tax deduction. The net after tax cost of the unit is $457 a month ($763 minus $306).
Advantages of buying a Home instead of paying Rent
For a lot of first time buyers, buying a home is not a hard task to deal with. While most of the first time buyers have their parents on the lease, most of the Students qualify on their own for their own homes. You might not even need a co-signer if you can work something out with your real estate agent and mortgage broker.
If you liked this article, click here to buy me a beer!The best career paths for nerds and the colleges offering them
May 1, 2007
Online University Lowdown has an excellent article on the 25 best colleges for nerds and some of the cool courses being offered at these colleges.
From colleges with video game design majors to artificial intelligence, to majors in ‘ethical hacking’, colleges around the world are starting to appeal to the nerds in all of us. This list of 25 courses and programs offered at colleges around the world identifies some of the nerdiest coursework, starting with the most obvious, and winding up with the most obscure…
Note: Most of the courses listed below are full 4 year courses. Also, clicking on the links below will take you straight to the course listing whether at physical universities or online schools. A lowdown according to them …
# 1: Game Software Design and Production at DigiPen Insititute of Technology
# 2: Ethical Hacking at the University of Abertay in Dundee, Scotland and InfoSec Institute
# 3: Open Source Development at University of California Berkeley and online equivalent at University of Illinois
# 4: Cryptography at Stanford University, MIT and University of Washington
# 5: Network Security at the University of Tennessee Knoxville and an online equivalent at The American Intercontinental University
If you liked this article, click here to buy me a beer!You know you are in College when …
April 23, 2007
1. High school started before 8am, but now anything before noon is considered “early.”
2. You have more beer than food in your fridge.
3. Weekends start on Thursday.
4. 6am is when you go to sleep, not when you wake up.
5. You know many different ways to cook ramen noodles or macaroni and cheese.
6. The health center gives out free condoms, and people take them… just in case.
7. Instead of falling asleep in class, you stay in bed.
8. You know how late McDonald’s, Taco Bell, Qdoba, etc. are open.
9. You think it’s the weekend on a Wednesday and you don’t know what month it is.
10. You can’t remember the last time you washed your car.
11. Your underwear/sock supply dictates your laundry schedule.
12. You check Facebook/Myspace more than once a day.
13. You get drunk dialed on any night of the week.
14. You wash dishes in the bathroom sink.
15. You’ve fallen off a loft bed.
16. You talk about beer pong like it’s a sport.
17. Finding random people in your house is perfectly normal, and you even sympathize with them… sometimes when you wake up you have no idea where you are.
18. Your primary news sources are the Daily Show and the Colbert Report.
19. You open a beer at 10 am and your roommate asks you if there’s more.
20. The standard of meals per day falls to two, sometimes just one.
21. Your trash is overflowing and your bank account isn’t.
22. You go to Target or WalMart more than 3 times a week.
23. You wear the same jeans for 13 days without washing them.
24. Your breakfast consists of a coke or cereal bar on the way to class… anything with caffeine will do.
25. Quarters are like gold.
26. Your idea of feeding the poor is buying yourself some ramen noodles.
27. You live in a house with three couches, none of which match.
28. You try to study but seem to procrastinate by eating, going to study breaks, talking to people, etc…
29. You talk to your roommate on instant messenger when you’re both home.
30. You ask people what YOU did last night.
31. Facebook becomes a part of your daily life – when friends say something funny, oh “that’s going on facebook.” When friends take pictures of you, you wonder how long it will take them to post them.
32. You’ve seen a hit and run involving a bicyclist/pedestrian.
33. You see people you know you’ve met but can never remember their names or how you know them.
34. You sleep more in class than in your room
35. Your idea of a square meal is a box of Pop-Tarts.
36. You’ve traveled with bags of dirty clothes.
37. You go home to do your laundry because you’re too poor to pay the $2… or too lazy to go to a change machine.
38. You pay $100 for a book you don’t read once, return it four months later, and get $7.
39. More than 20% of your household furnishings are made from milk crates.
40. You recognize the meat in the dorm soup as yesterday’s meatloaf, and thus decide to eat a nice bowl of cereal - a safe bet for any meal.
41. You use words like “thus” (see #40).
42. You throw out bowls and plates because you don’t feel like washing them.
43. Your beer pong table is nicer than all your other tables.
44. It takes preparation… and 3 people… to take out your garbage.
45. Going to the library is a social event.
46. You wear flip flops in the shower your freshman year… you know why.
47. You start joining clubs because of the free food.
48. Visits home depend on how much money you have for gas.
49. You skip one class to write a paper for another.
50. You have no idea where your tuition money is going… technology fees? I think not.
51. Bicycles don’t seem as lame as they did in high school.
52. You stay up late to finish homework then sleep through the class it was due in.
53. Girls: You’ve balanced your foot on a shampoo bottle to shave.
54. Your backpack is giving you scoliosis.
55. You’ve written a check for 45 cents or stopped to get $2.00 of gas.
56. Your bill in the bookstore will be comparable to tuition.
57. Going to the mailbox becomes an ego booster/breaker.
58. Most of your T.A.s are foreign…what’s the deal?
59. You never realized so many people are smarter than you.
60. You never realized so many people are dumber than you.
61. Western Europe could be wiped out by a terrible plague and you’d never know, but you can recite the last episode of your favorite show verbatim.
62. Care packages rank right up there with birthdays.
63. You craft ways to make any game into a drinking/stripping game.
64. You meet the type of people you thought only existed in the movies.
65. Printers break down only when you desperately need them.
66. Anything can be cooked in a microwave.
67. Two words: bike cops.
68. You have Safe Ride programmed into your phone.
69. Old school Nintendo… and guitar hero… are pretty much the best things ever.
70. Going to the grocery at midnight is completely normal.
71. You call restaurants that deliver more than you call your own family.
72. You finish reading this and wonder how you can procrastinate next.
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