Sex Education: Finger Finesse, the art of fingering a woman
Have you ever seen a porno? Don’t lie. I’m convinced a lot of guys — too many — got their sexual how-to from skin flicks they watched as teenagers when their parents weren’t home. And that can lead to big problems when they attempt to imitate the digital maneuvering they saw onscreen during real-life sexual situations.
I’m not saying you’re that guy, but if you are — don’t be that guy.
Porn actresses aren’t given enough credit for their thespian skills. They should win an Academy Award for the moans and scream they emit when the man rubs his finger as fast as he can against their genitals, as if he were some perverted boy scout trying to start a fire by rubbing two sticks together. But let me tell you, in real life, friction burns just aren’t orgasmic. In fact, they hurt!
So how do you give good digital stimulation, the kind that makes a real girl moan like a porn star?
I decided to ask the one man who they say you can ask anything: Jeeves, the Internet butler. After all, I had once asked him the meaning of life and he had an answer for that.
Once on the site, I typed in my question. How can you massage a woman’s clitoris the right way? After clicking enter I found a plethora of step-by-step articles on giving a man a hand job and places you could find pictures of the area in question but that dirty old man Jeeves had absolutely nothing on women. (Which leads me to believe the whole meaning of life thing he came up with was probably a crock too.)
My friend Pam has much more to say on the subject of how guys should treat the clit. “They need to know it exists. They go straight for the hole, which does absolutely nothing for most women. Sure, it feels great for them. It’s a homerun for them, first base for us,” she laments.
“Boys, get with the times, and the techniques. You know how to use a mouse for your computer?” Pam asks. “Well in order to please us girls, you need to know where to point and click — and sometimes double click!”
Got it? To help you with your quest to “point and click” right, I decided it would be best to do some good old-fashioned research. With the eager help of my boyfriend Rich, I came up with the following tips:
* The clitoris has a lot of nerve endings in it; think of it as a miniature penis. You don’t have to press on it hard to make it feel good. In fact, the lighter the touch, at least in my experience, the nicer the sensation. Too hard and you can actually bruise it, which could leave a woman in pain for days.
* Don’t be in a hurry to get her panties off. For women, the sensation of touch through the fabric can actually be a bigger turn on. Also, touch gently around the area at first instead of just going in for the kill.
* Make use of both hands. One can be massaging the clitoris while the other wanders to other areas, like to the breasts.
* Two seconds of foreplay isn’t going to do it. You’ve got to take your time.
* Switch off using your hands and using your tongue.
* Every woman is different, so ask her how she likes it and pay attention to how she reacts to what you’re doing.
* Enjoy yourself, and she probably will too.
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