Having sex for the first time? Here’s what to expect.
The first time, a.k.a. losing it, being deflowered, breaking the seal, losing your innocence, popping the cherry — there are lots of names for it. But when you’ve decided to have sex for the first time, the names don’t matter. What matters is being ready and having some idea of what it’s all about.
Pre-Play
When the big day (or more likely, night) arrives, no matter how you set it up — with candles, champagne, and sexy lingerie, or as just another night — it’s bound to be more exciting, and at least a little more nerve wracking, than your standard hook-up.
So do yourself a few favors. First, have protection ready. There’s enough to worry about without having to add concern about contracting an infection or dealing with a pregnancy. If you don’t have a supply of condoms, go get some. Frank Littlefield*, a senior at Boston University, remembers making a fast trip to the store on his first night. He was at a friend’s house for a holiday party. When he discovered both he and his (also virginal) partner were latex-less, he “ran to the drug store. I grabbed one of those 75-cent single packs, and sprinted back. She was waiting for me.”
Next, get in the mood. This is supposed to be fun, so relax and enjoy it. Turn on some sexy music, and then it’s time for — hey guys, are you paying attention? — foreplay, foreplay, foreplay. The more excited and worked up you both are, the easier and smoother the whole thing will be.
Getting In
Take it from the veterans: Penetration is rarely as easy as it looks in the movies. So you can probably expect a little, er, poking around before the ship docks in the port. And don’t be surprised if a little manhandling is required. Sharon LaRusso, a senior at UCLA who lost her virginity at age 17, recalls the pre-entry moment as silly, but fun. “There were a few mis-pokes around my thighs. Then he guided it in with his hands,” she remembers.
Prior to experiencing sex, most virgins have heard from a variety of sources that the first time hurts for a woman. According to most women — and some men — this was their biggest concern about the whole experience. The truth? First-time sex may be a tad wince-worthy, but you’re not passing a kidney stone. “It hurt a little, but nowhere near as much as I’d expected,” says Lindsay Kelly, a senior at the University of Delaware who lost it at age 19. Gretchen Lazlo, a sophomore at Colby College and a virgin till age 16, says, “It was a little uncomfortable at first, but I wouldn’t call it painful.”
According to these same women, the best way to make it as painless as possible can be summed up in two words: Go slow. John Tatum of Emory University remembers asking his partner, who was also a virgin, several times how she was doing and if it hurt. “I knew that if she didn’t like it the first time, she probably wouldn’t want to sleep with me again!” he says. “So I was gentle, and kept checking in with her to make sure everything was OK. Later, she told me she was so glad I did that.”
The Act
Let’s get one thing straight right off the bat: First time out, the big O is mainly the domain of the guys. No, it’s not fair, but that’s just the way it is. If you’re a female and you’re with someone who is very experienced, there’s a chance you might be sent into waves of orgasmic ecstasy, but don’t count on it. “I don’t know of anyone who [had an orgasm] the first time,” says Lindsay. Sharon agrees: “It was at least a year before I came while having sex.”
For guys, by most accounts, the first time is a quickie. Most guys I talked to estimated their first time lasted about 1-3 minutes. At best. “Put it this way: I could have beat Maurice Green,” says Dave Wayland of Princeton University. So coming quickly is nothing to be embarrassed about. If you’re with a more experienced girl, then “they know what to expect from you” says Frank. If you’re with another virgin, you really don’t have to worry. Hannah Kischler, a junior at Smith College, says her first time was “mercifully quick,” since the first time for her “was fun, but it wasn’t generally enjoyable from a physical point of view.”
Experimenting with different positions may not be the best thing your first time around — unless, of course you’re with someone who has more experience than you and who is comfortable taking you through the steps. Most men and women, however, find that the missionary position works just fine for that first test run.
Many novices worry about rhythm. Don’t. Rhythm is something that comes with practice, and from getting to know how your partner moves. “I definitely didn’t know what I was doing,” recalls Barry Glover, a senior at Drew University. “I didn’t really get the motions going. I never practiced on an apple pie or anything.” His recommendation? Slap on some tunes. Sexy tunes, that is. “It’s about slow, constant, steady rhythmical pressure. If you lack rhythm, like I did, try putting on music. It’s like dancing. Just move to the beat.”
Lindsay remembers the one thing that kept going through her mind. ‘I didn’t know what to do with my knees!” she laughs. It may seem trivial, but she, like many other men and women, remembers worrying about simple little things like their limbs. The best advice on this front — and overall — came from Jean Kirkpatrick, a recent graduate of Kenyon College. “There’s nothing you can do wrong. Okay, so you want to make sure you don’t hurt your partner. But outside of that, there’s absolutely nothing really right or really wrong you can do.”
Getting Out
Hey, you’ve done the deed. Congratulations. But don’t screw up now. Guys, when you pull out, grab the condom, hold on, and pull out slowly. Spillage is bad. You put that thing on for a reason, make sure you use it correctly. Don’t wait a long time to pull out, either. Instantaneous removal isn’t essential, but shrinkage can cause spillage, so watch out.
Aftermath
There are a few things you should know about after-sex. One is cleanup. Condoms are pretty neat and tidy, but have some Kleenex (or at least an old T-shirt) handy just in case.
Another is the smell. You may have heard people talk about the smell of sex, but you probably don’t know what it is till you’ve done it. Barry loved it then, and loves it now. He first smelled it after having sex for the first time at age 16. “Mmmm. I didn’t shower for two days!” he reminisces. Now, while we don’t necessarily recommend this particular course of action, a little reveling in the scent isn’t a bad thing.
Finally, while guys won’t be left with many physical reminders after their first time, women might notice a little bleeding. No big deal — it should hardly be enough to qualify as spotting, and should go away quickly. “I noticed a little blood in the shower afterward, but it was gone by the next morning,” says Gretchen. Women might also be a little sore or tender the day after, but that feeling should also go away soon.
So good luck, and remember: No one really knows what to do the first time around. But folks have been successfully bonking for millions of years. They all figured it out. And you will too. So relax, take it slow, and don’t worry about any sexual snafus. Just do what seems natural and comfortable. “There won’t be any swinging from the chandeliers at first,” says Sharon. “That’ll happen in time. You have to figure out what works with the person you’re with. And that’s true when you’re with any new person for the first time — it doesn’t matter if it’s your first lover, or your tenth.”
So, the rundown… the spark notes version to having sex for the first time and tips to make it even better
Talk it up. Not with your friends — although they might be able to give you some good advice. Talk to you partner before the big night. Talk about your experience, your concerns, your expectations. If you can talk about it before sex, it’ll be easier to talk about it during and after, too. And make sure to ask about your partner’s sexual history. Consider getting tested together to make sure you’re both clean.
Rubbers, gloves, latex, protection Call ‘em what you will. Have condoms on hand. (Oh — in case you weren’t paying attention — use condoms.)
Size might matter. We’ve all heard theories on whether or not penis size matters. We don’t have any answers to the age-old question here, but we can tell you that penis size can make a difference if it’s your first time. If a guy is particularly large, entry and sex can be a bit more tedious for everyone involved. Just make sure you take it slow.
Live and learn. Having some “all but” (as in “all but sex”) experience helps. If you’ve previously been initiated into the joys of making out, feeling up, and giving and receiving oral sex, then sex itself is a whole lot less intimidating. You’re already comfortable with squirts, spurts, and other bodily functions.
Lube job. If you’re having trouble getting in, or if you’re experiencing pain after penetration, you may want to have some KY jelly or other non-oil-based lubricant on hand. If you don’t feel comfortable with lubricant, use a natural substitute — saliva can work wonders. Let there be light? Lights on or off, it’s entirely up to you. Sex is sex, light or no light. But it may help to know that many first timers recommend darkness. You’ll both probably be less self-conscious that way.
No crowded house. Make sure your door has a lock. Use it. The last thing you need is your roomie or anyone else detracting from your first bout in bed.
*All names have been changed to protect the no-longer innocent.
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I think that this website is great..im getting ready to have my first time with my best friend..he has had sex before..but i trust him with all i have.Im really scared though..well not so much scared but really i dont know what to do.Though i have been told its not to painful im still nervious.I dont wont my Virginity because when i do have it with someone i love i dont want it to be painful.I want to enjoy it.I have been searching around for the anwsers to my problem..though some are not anwsered this site helped alot.I just hope i can pull though without looking completly insane..im quet self-conseous
Hi Angie, its nice to know you are taking the relationship to the next level. “Doing it” with your best friend is something you might want to think about though.
http://www.askstudent.com/2006/11/26/falling-in-love-with-a-friend-how-to-deal-with-such-situations/
However, you seem to be confident and happy with the situation you are in. If you have any other questions or more likely doubts, feel free to throw them in here. Our readers or one of our editors will be more than happy to try to answer any questions you might have. I would also recommend that you explore our sex category at AskStudent. You will find many articles that will put you at ease.
http://www.askstudent.com/category/sex/
i was readin ur article and it luked gud…my girlfriends a virgin and we tried having sex but it just wouldnt happen and it was obviously causing her a lot of pain, but more than that we were both getting tired and frustrated because it just wasnt happening and i wondered if you had any advice?! thanks
Hey Antony, take it easy. It will happen. Maybe you can create the right atmosphere. While Valentine’s day has long passed, maybe your bday or her bday is coming up. If not a bday, maybe you can set up a romantic candlelight dinner someplace. Create the right atmosphere and trust me, everything else will fall in place.
I lost my virginity last night. It was painful because we couldn’t really figure out how to get him in. Any help would be appreciated.
can you still get disease’s like aids with a condom on.
With a condom on, you avoid a lot of diseases like AIDS etc. However, you still need to show caution as AIDS and HIV does spread through Saliva. Also, if your partner has genital herpes, then it might spread too. If you wish to avoid any kind of Sexually Transmitted Diseases, the key word is in the STD itself.. abstain from having sex. But, that doesnt solve the issue does it
Hey Christi, the first time I had sex, my boy friend had no Idea. Do what I did, guide him in. Trust me, he will take it from there. The first couple of times, we did not do the missionary position too. I used to be on top…
Try these suggestions out…
Angie Everhart…
I Googled for something completely different, but found your page…and have to say thanks. nice read….
y does it hurt my girlfreind after awhile when were makeing love she well com a couple times and then it starts to hurt her and i try to hurry and i cant it seems like it takes me forever y does it hurt her and take me so long to com it cant be cuz imnot attracted to her she is very hot and its not that i dont love her and she dont love me we were both virgins and r unexperienced please help i want it to be really special when we make love
hey what do you all think is an appriate age to have sex if you are in love?
I think anything after 16 is a good age. I believe once u are a senior, you are always in your senses and know what you are doing. BUt that’s just me. I kno a lot of people who waiting till they are 18 and into college.
I think these are good tips. My girlfriend is more experienced than me hehe, in fact, I’m the virgin we tried to make love once and i screw it up . I was inside of her and suddenly I couldn’t mantain the erection. Now, when I’m with her and i’m trying to do it again i just can’t. i’m very worry about it and I do not know if i have a disfunctional erection problem, please help me !!
Well, George, all I will suggest you don’t let your past failure haunt your present. As in your comments “dont worry about it”. It will happen my friend.
Well i lost my virinity about a year ago. and i now have a new partner (he seems to be more experienced then the 1st). Well, i noticed this feeling when we’re having sex. It’s like a rapid pulse in my virgina. Wat does that mean??? This is something new to me and i would really like to know wat it means. Can any one help??
Well, I am sort of in a rut right now. I have a friend who is much older than me but I like him. He is not wanting a relationship right now, but like most guys he wouldn’t mind having sex with me. I am a virgin and I don’t know what to do. When I am with him I feel comfortable, but at times I feel like I don’t want to go all the way with him because I know that for him it was just sex and for me it would be more than just sex. But then I think well if I feel comfortable why not? I think I feel comfortable because he is older and more experienced and knows what to do, and in a way he won’t hurt me. Please if you have any advice it would be greatly appreciated! thanks!!
I lost my virginity two nights ago, and it was the most painful thing of my life. Even the second time it just hurts, like if he’s gentel, its just if he pushes too far in it hurts, and i never can finish because of the pain. Can you help me??
i lost my virginity about a month ago and i didnt bleed at all it hurt a little a first but was ok after, but me and my boyfriend were having sex last nite and i started to bleed it was like a rush of blood i cleaned up and it was ok but today i’m spotting my boyfriend thinks its just because maybe my cherry didnt pop the first time then that was it but i dunno it wasnt alot of blood but it was enuf to freak me out and today im spotting what does this mean???
I had sex with my girlfriend for the first and second times this past weekend. She came both times, but I didn’t come at all…what’s up with that?
She’s faking it.
I’m a virgin. One day my friend hacked onto my myspace and started talking to my bf about him and me doing it. then we started getting all serious about it and now he’s coming up to my dad’s place in Vegas(parents r divorce and live in different states….). It’s good because my mom and step-dad don’t like me going anywhere because he is (idk i guess they think i’m a slut…) and this could be the only time we get to hang out all summer. I really trust him and everything, but i’m still really scared that I’ll get preggo and i feel even worse that we’ll be sneaking around to do it while my dad’s at work…but i want us to so bad!!! I just don’t know what to do and i’m running out of time because he’s coming down on Friday!
Me and my girlfriend are both 16 and are coming up on a year of going out. We have tried 3 times with condoms and cant get penetration to occur it just doesnt go in. She sometimes holds me and tries but it reduces blood flow i think so i lose mine and i dont even know its just tough were getting discouraged. any tips or suggestions? positions? music? lube? just post right here
Hi, I am in need of dire help! A few nights ago me and my gf were having sex. At the end some yellow goo started coming out of her twat. I got some goo on my penis.
Now I’m very scared because I have a headache every day and turns out she has HIV.
Hi folks,
look—the first time hurts…hurts like hell. I was lucky b/c my bf was very experienced, we loved each other, felt ready (he never pressured me) and he went very slow. He knew what he was doing and did everything right. Golly, I was so impressed and grateful b/c I had so much rushing through my head anyway.
He spoke to me, calmed me down with sweet words and reminded me that he thought I was beautiful and sexy. That made such a difference.
But remember girls, your vagina has never had something in it so big before and the hymen is a piece of flesh that must be broken in order to have sex the first time. Don’t be afraid of the pain—know it’s coming and make sure your partner is loving and aware that this is something he is going to help you get through.
It’s a great feeling once you get the hang of it, i promise. It’s a TOTALLY new feeling, nothing compares. Your body will be in shock so be patient with yourself and relish in the love of your partner who is (should be!!) so joyful to share this with you.
umm. i had sex with my girlfriend last night and it was her first time. she left a puddle of blood and also bleeding a little bit today morning… getting worried~~ please help
Okay, first of all this site is great!
I had sex with my ex bf almost a year ago. He was very experienced, and had sex many times before me. So I told him to get tested. Fortunatelly, he was clean. I’d say my first time sucked. It was way too painful though he wasn’t that big. I bled a little bit, and felt like crap physically and emotionally. After that, we didn’t have sex anymore because I was afraid it would hurt again. I also felt a little scared. We broke up a month after having sex on may 23 2006. I moved on, and met this amazing guy on new years. We dated, and had sex a week ago. I was still afraid it would hurt because I only had sex once and it hapenned more than a year ago. To my surprise, this new guy was waaaay more experienced than the last one, so he taught me through it. It didn’t hurt a bit. I PROMISE! the thing I didn’t know back then was that a lot of FOREPLAY is needed before intercourse when you’re a virgin, or like me, haven’t had sex in a long time. My ex bf didn’t treat me the way this new guy did. He was sweet, checked if i was ok every 2 minutes lol, and was really careful and of course way more experienced. I ended up having the first time that I wanted the second time I had sex. So girls, the secret is, lots of foreplay and most important of all, RELAX AND DON’T BE AFRAID!
I also think this site is great. It reminds me a lot of another site called MyFirstTimeThePlay.com, which is a site I stumbled onto when researching first times. Do you know they are making an Off-Broadway show about people’s first times?! It looks really cool and hilarious.
ok. so i like this site. really helpful.
but one of my guy friends and i decided that we are hooking up this weekend. and hes expierenced and im not. so im really nervous.
i was wondering if there is any advice to make me feel more comfortable about it.
I’m having a bit of an issue with my b/f i love him and everything he loves me back but when we go to have sex i like chicken out is there something wrong with me?
How old are you Shelly? And honestly, if you aren’t ready, then you aren’t ready. If he really loves you, and understands that, then he won’t pressure you into it. Unlike some people like to believe, sex should NOT be such an important factor in a relationship, to where people break up, or lose interest in one another.
My partner is totally satisfied, as I can go down on her and just keep on going. Same with her on me. SHE was actually the more experienced sexual one of the two of us, me being the virgin back then. I was nervous, but with her re-assurance, I did, after finally just relaxing.
Just be comfortable with who you are, relax, USE PROTECTION, and enjoy. Don’t think about it so much, just let it happen.
IMe and my girlfriend have been going out for a year and a half and we both want to have sex but shes afraid of getting pregnant.She is also afraid of it hurting alot. We are both new to it al and we just need some advice. She could go on birth control but she doesnt like the big side effect of gaining weight. Im also a little worried about my condom breaking. Like i said we both really want to we just need some advice..it would be greatly appreciated.
Chris, these fears in girls is not at all RARE and should be expected. Of course everyone is a little bit scared of the possibility of getting pregnant, but if you use the protection properly, the chances are very slim and you should be fine. And it hurts for most women, but some it doesn’t. She can’t be scared of the pain, she just has to be ready to go for it. Just don’t think about it so much and get lost in the magical activity that is making ~love~
yup, i’m lame, i know.
But PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE, all of you people, if you don’t feel you are ready then DO NOT DO IT. There is no rush whatsoever, you’ve got your whole lives to do this, if you aren’t ready, then just don’t do it. No pressure, take your time. =)
ok so me and my girlfriend had sex thursday and friday and both days i came once then switched condoms and came again and she still hadnt came yet..what shud we do..i want her to orgasm and we rnt sure if her cherry popped cuz there was no mess nd she said she felt hardly any pain…HELP!!!!!!!
last night was the big night, but i dont think we did it right. It was hard for him to get it and it was a bit painful for me, so we would stop trying. He used a lubricant to get in but i dont know if we were successful. this sounds so funny. how can i tell if it was a success? i read about the blood and there isnt any and/or i didnt feel sore.
This website was fantastic. My boyfriend and I just finished having sex successfully for the first time. I decided to look some things up on the net about loosing my virginity, and this one came up.. I found the information provided to be so …… RELIEVING! After reading all of it, I felt so reassured and so much better about everything. Our first time was great, but after reading all this I just felt awesome knowing that everything we did, and everything that occured was normal. Thank you so much
I love this website.its very good for people like me.
is jerking of to celebs commen cos i always google pic serch jen garner naked and go
i love my gf and just fucked her 2 mins ago and wants it again should i do it
i am 17 and my girlfriend have been together for over a year and a half, we are both ready to have sex for the first time, what should i talk to her about before we do it, what should i do with her before we actually have intercourse, help plz…….
Check it out… even more info: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/sexuality/first_intercourse_101 thanks to the totally awesome Heather Corinna (who deserves all the praise she can get for the wonder that is Scarleteen.)
If it hurts a lot, or you bleed a lot, girls, make sure you’re actually doing something you want to do and are turned on. Your body’s not crazy - sometimes bleeding occurs because you’re not sufficiently lubricated, and sometimes that’s just your body reflecting that you’re not all that sure about it or are feeling uncomfortable or not aroused. Be sure it’s what you want to do. Sex is meant to be fun, and the whole loss of virginity thing is quite often overstated. It’s a good plan to take the advice above: practice a whole lot of ‘all but’ sex before you get to the penis+vagina variety: you’ll be more at ease with each other, more at ease with feeling really turned on with each other, better at turning each other on, and maybe even more at ease about actually orgasming together. (And girls really ought to do some solo practice so they *know* what works for them and can help the brothers out!)
Guys, the whole flagging in the middle of sex is most likely to be you worrying about it - about whether you’re doing it right, whether she’s about to come, whether you are… Relax. Even if it’s the first time, this should be about fun between the two of you. It’s okay to laugh and be silly (just not mean). In fact, treating sex as a deeply serious affair, or as something you need to get done to match up to something you think you should match is one perfect, sure-fire way to make yourselves more anxious!
By the by, those girls worried that they *haven’t* broken the hymen after sex, it’s far more likely that you broke the hymen some other way. Riding a bike can do it, and sometimes putting in tampons etc, so don’t run around thinking that you really ought to be bleeding the first time!! If you don’t feel pain and don’t bleed, don’t worry - you’ve had sex! That cherry’s been popped. Now comes the fun of replays (hopefully in slow-mo!).
And always practice safer sex!
Hello, me & my boyfriend want to have sex, he’s going to use a condom. but i dont want 2 go on the pill as we’re only going to do it the once.. is that safe?
hello ppl.well i am going out with two girls.One knows that i have another girl friend but the other doesnt know. I love them both but i dont know what to do. i love both of them.My girl friend(Jane) that knows that i have another girfriend,Jane and i had sex and i brokke her virginity.So now i dont know which one to choose..i really need help Mr admin…well its kinda wierd but i dont what soup i have ended myself into…..which girl shall i choose..\thanks
Well, I might not be MR Admin, but I think I know how to answer this question.
Jake,
I think you should have at least told the other girl that you were dating someone else along with her, and that the other girl knoew about her, AND that you had sex with the other girl. That way, she can be the one to make the decision of whether or not you deserve to be with her or not.
I’ve had friends that have dating to girls at once, and I’ve always wondered why they do it? Why would you date two woman at once, especially with one of them unknowing of you secret? And why do you decide now, after you’ve already done the deed with one of them, that you should be thinking about which girl you should stay with?
In my own opinion, you shouldnt be the one to decide, and I also think you dont deserve either girl, even if one of them was okay with it. Shes at fault there, but right now its about you.
So to answer your question, two things:
1) Do what you feel is right
2) Tell the other girl your dating someone else as well as her(Cheating).
i’m still a virgin and i’m glad i found out what to expect my first time thanks:)
I am planning on having sex with my girlfriend for the first time this weekend. We have talked about it a LOT and are both completely ready. I want to be as safe as possible. I am going to take it very slow so she isn’t hurt but I want to know IF the condom breaks what does it feel like? I don’t expect it to but I just want to be prepared.
i tried having sex with my last boyfriend, but it didnt work, then he dumped me. Now im with this new guy several months later and he really wants sex, and im cool with that, just he doesnt know im a virgin and i havent told him as i know hed be annoyed with me not telling him before…do you think he’ll notice i i just go through with it?
I lost my viginity today. Emotionally I was ready, but i dont know about physically. Having sex hurt ALOT. I did notice that the more I raised my legs the easier the penetration. It was my bfs first time. I had triend it before but did not achieve penetration bc it hurt. We used a condom but I hate wondering ‘what if’ so I am thinking about getting a Day after Pill. Should I? I read a question (still unanswered) above, about a Pulsing feeling in the vigina afterwards. I had the same feeling. The statement about there being No Pyshical Reminders… is it really true? I dont exacly feel sore maybe tender and can actually feel that ‘pulsing’ sensation. Is that being turned on aka horny? In conclusion to my experience, it hurt alot. I feel like a women! =D
me and my gf had sex a couple days ago, it was my first time and not hers. i was having trouble getting it up and when i finally had it semi erect and put it in her i came very quickly there after. she said it always comes quickly the guys first time and ive read that here but im still nervous about the next time. is the 2nd time usually a quickie too????? advice quickly would be appreciated
20 year old virgin
My girlfriend is 17 and she is also a virgin. We have been together for 2 years and I have always wanted to wait till I was married but now she is saying she is ready to have sex. I love her more than anything and will do anything to make her happy. We have been talking about having sex and I am really nervious. I want it to be perfect. I love my body and my penis, but she is very self concious and shy. I want her to be comfortable and relaxed. I tell her she is beautiful and sexy all the time because she is. I just dont know how to get her to not be so self concious. I am also scared about hurting her. My penis is bigger than average and she is just tiny. She says that I should just go quick so it doesnt hurt, like pulling off a band aid, but I would prefer slow. I dont know which is better. She is my sweetheart and I dont want to hurt her.
love is in the air..
Okay… Theres this guy who i trust and who i know wont hurt me…. but he has had sex many times in the past and i told him i have had sex but i didn’t…. :-S And i told him i’ve only done it once . I want to have sex with him but i dont want to be caught in a lie…. can i get away with this lie and have sex with him? is the second time the same as the fisrt? :S please i really want to know
i am worried about coming durring foreplay.has this ever happened to anyone and do you have any advice
Ok, dude this website gave me quite a release…..fhew!!..What I mean is that I had sex for the frist time yesterday…all went well but I came to quickly..in that moment I was terrefied..cuz I felt like something is wrong with me…will that thing,affect my sexual life from now one?…. But I read your article, and i’m cool with it. Thanks, Harry!
Ok i jus turned 15 and i feel like im ready although i still am a virgin and my girlfriend isnt…..we plan 2 have sex 2marro bcuz its are 4 month anniversary 2day and we wanna celebrate by having sex for the first time with eachother i think im ready but im still a little nervous …any help?
well i’m 15 not quite ready to have sex has yet but it has been on my mind, i’m worried i will bleed and i know eveyone says you will only bleed a little please tell the truth because i actually saw someone bleed like alot(long story) so does it vary with everyone or not?
I tried haveing sex with my boyfirend for the first time and he went in me but i got scared….i thought about STDs and pregnecy so as he was in me and we had started i said i couldn’t go on…he did have a comdom on thow…how safe are condoms? did i over exagerate? I really wanted to do it and finish the act ..i love him and want to be with him but I am scadred of pregnecy.. what can I do to so stay safe and be sure?
well me and my guy mate were drinking in the woods along with smoking ect.
i came onto him without knowing he had a girlfriend. we had sex which i felt comfortable with because i trusted him and he was actually one of my previous boyfriends, but it hurt alot and his *thing* didnt actually go all the way in because it hurt so much!
the worst thing was is that it was -7 degrees we were obv naked and with only 2 jackets to cover us.
we did use protection ect.
plus he kept on saying stuff like ‘is tht nice?’ which really didnt turn me on is it normal to dislike this sort of stuff?
i want to have sex with him again but feel really guilty about his gf which obviously he has not been faithful
HELP!!!!!!!!
Me and my boyfriend have been going out for a year now, and we have been talking a lot about doing it. I trust him with everything and we are completely comfortable with each other. As a girl, i still always worry about pregnancy, pain, or doing something wrong. Overall, the website was helpful and did answer a lot of the questions that we had and questions that we needed to be answered. Thanks for all of your help.
Kait’s my girlfriend =] we have been together a year tomorrow and we are deeply in love and we are totally ready. its gonna be rad. thanks for everything guys.. this website was way helpful and now i feel a lot better about it since i know what to expect. its awesome to hear everyone’s stories so we know that we aren’t the only couple that has concerns. thanks again for everything.
i love this site, it thereputicaly spoke 2 me
ily sexy man in the pic 
ps im nt gay it was a joke :/
uh well me and my girlfriend have been talking about it for a while now. well i wasnt too sure about it. but when we were talking on the phone, a few hours later i came. yet i didnt even touch myself. i mean for gods sake i dont even masturbate. i really want her. it kills. im 15 and i know its still against the law to do it. any suggestions?
I did not know how to sex for first time please give me suggestions via pictures that help me for that i will be grateful
to anon
even though ur underage it dosent really matter - well not to me anyway.
if it feels right go for it and if ur girlfriend truly loves you she will understand if you want to wait a while!!!!
hope this helped wb
xxx
thanks chipmonk
we’ve talked alot more and were gonna try once we get the chance. im lucky, shes really understanding, we talk stuff through. but we want to wait til im of age.
Yesterday was my first time doing it with my byfrnd it very painful.
Alright, here we go. I’m 17 years old, and I’ve never had sex before. I’m really reserved and I don’t want my first time to be with just anybody, I even debated on whether I should wait till marriage to have sex, but my hormones are raging, and so I decided against it. I know I’m ready, I’m just nervous about if I’m ready to do it with the guy I’m seeing.
In a few months I will be staying with him for a week as a sort of vacation trip. We talk about having sex all the time, even joke about it over the phone during our late night phone calls… but even though I’m emotionally and mentally ready for it, I don’t know if I’m physically ready. He’s 19 and experienced, so I’m afraid of making myself look like a total idiot. I love him more than anything, and just like all first-timers, I’m afraid that my nervousness and unease about the “night” will ruin the mood or make it awkward. In my head I can’t help but tell myself that most guys like him (handsome, experienced, jock-type) expect their sex to be a certain way, as well as their girl, which just adds to my worry. I may seem ready whenever we talk about it, but what about the “final showdown”? And the pain! How painful will it be? I have so many questions bouncing around in my head, I can hardly keep myself from going insane. I basically just want my first time to be as comfortable as possible…. Any suggestions?
okay! im bk again lol!!!
im really worried because my above comment about me having sex well now i think i might be pregnant!!! i have tenderness in my nipples, i have had stomach ache in my lower stomach. i have had a very very short period, about 2 nd a half days and i have had a need for way more sleep than usual!!!
H E L P ! !
Ok this is whats up. Me and my boyfriend are going to prom together. We’ve been talking about ‘Doin It’. Its both our first time i was just wondering if anyone had any advice?
to jordan!
if ur both ready go 4 it, but make sure ur somewhere where u can relax and be secure. nd make sure u have protection!
nd my test came back negative yay it was such a relief!
I’m a little worried about my first time, which is going to be tomorrow night. I’m tweleve years old, don’t judge. My boyfriend is 16. I really want to have sex so bad. Nobody in my class has done it. I don’t want to get pregnant if the condom breaks or something happens.
hey vanilla baby.
to be honest, thats quite a big age difference there. your only twelve. wouldnt it be better to wait til your a little older and know a bit more about it? i mean im 15 now and me and my girlfriend havent attempted anything yet coz we dont feel ready to. the condoms arnt really that prone to breaking. theres around 99% chance you’ll stay safe. but if anything does happen, it could ruin your life. ive seen it done. just have a think about it. is it what you really want?
Me and my boyfriend are talking about having sex, I want to But I’m a little worried because its my first time and he’s done it before. I don’t want to do something wrong and make myself look stupid, or ruin it for him.. if that makes any since… Any advice?
ok so I’m 14 and my boyfriends 15 and i know im ready to have sex and everything and we tried and it was both of our first times and well it hurt really really bad so we stopped. and since then weve tried it again on like 6 different occasions but it still hurts like hell and i really want to get it in and stuff and i just dont know how to break it. it just wont break and it hurts so bad everytime and i really really want it to break and just whats the best way? should you go slowly or really fast or could you take something first or like lick the condom first? just what should we do? HELP!!!!
oooooooooooooooooooo mmmmmmmmmmmm gggggggggggg am having a baby affter the first time
i like to fuck my gf every night but im scared that i will be robbed if someone breaks into my house while i am having sex. what should i do?
Iv just read practically all the comments abouve there ..
People theres NO need too rush sex especially that 12 year old !!
im not judging at all!! … i started too get intamate with my boyfreind at 12 !! were not together anymoe but i dont regret it .
Iv only got intamate with two boys and im 15 and i am still a virgin and proud. Loesing your virginity shouldnt be about how people in yuur group of freinds have or if your boyfreind/girlfreind wants you too . It should be about YOU being ready i probably have had about 5 diffrent sinarious were i nearly lost my virginity 4 of them i didnt care about .. Im soo glad iv waited . Im not in a relationship at the moment but when i am before i even think about loesing my virginity im going too make sure hes that one person i can truely trust !! .. So just so you no im noy judgeing i thibnk that when you have sex (witch can be at any age) just make sure you love them .. trust them and always make sure your protected :]
i just had sex for the first time tonight.
no blood, hurt a little at the start but it was okay once it was in.
he came. we didn’t know whether we were doing it right but it was a fun experience and something to remember forever as something we did together :] and i think it has brought us much much closer. i love him! xo
i keep trying to get my girlfriend in the mood but after about like 2 min she i guess looses intrest in me plz help
ive got kind of a problem my girlfriend wanna have sex but i cant get past the foreplay thing she looses intrest or something is there any suggestions you can give me at all
i am horny what should i do
dude do what most others do. masturbate. (directed at hornyhead)
ok on the aftermath section you did mention that women do bleed but you made it sound as if all women just barely spot. im telling you thats not quite true. many bleed more than just spotting. i bleed so much that i had started my period. and i spotted for about 3 days after ward. my cousin did the same thing. just a little fyi for ya.
you guys talk like monks
me and my boyfriend have planned on having sex. we are both virgins. but im a little nervous. but im just so happy to be with him but im also afraid that i will regret having sex with him. but it doesnt make sense to me. i want to have sex, but im just afraid i’ll regret it. gahhh…help!
Okay, me && my boyfriend have been together for 8 months now and we think it’s finally time that we have sex. We’ve talked about sex a lot && done a lot of foreplay, but never gone the whole way. We’re both virgins && we’re both a bit nervous about it. He’s scared he won’t be able to make it ‘feel good’ && I’m scared that it’ll hurt.
When I do have sex I want it to be special && amazing, but from what I’ve read now I heard that it won’t be how I exactly pictured it.
So I guess my real questions are: Do I have him stop if I think it hurts too much? Will it really not feel as good as I want it to? && should I really not have my hopes up as high as I do? I don’t want to be ‘let down’ my first time. Oh, and also.. I don’t think I need to exactly use a condom for my first time because I’m planning on marrying him. Is that a bad decision not to use a condom?
I have become sexually active for the first time a few months ago with my girlfriend. For me it has not been very satisfying and I have not even ejaculated or had an orgasm once with my girlfriend yet, but I can easily by masturbating. My girlfriend on the other hand gets lots of orgasms from me and it looks like she is having a great time. When she has an orgasm, her body spasms uncontrollably and sometimes she falls off the bed from it. I’m sure that my problem is psychological and it will take time for me to feel comfortable withe her.
She’s had a contraceptive implant put into her left arm 2 and a half weeks ago, that lasts for 3 years and means no more condoms for me, which is great, cause sex with condoms for me is totally unsatisfying. But there are side effects and her period which used to last 4 days, has lasted over 2 weeks and been slow. This just means it is a bit messy and maybe her mood is not so good as it could be. We have been arguing lately and I’m sure it’s this damn implant’s fault. I hope her body gets used to it soon, with short periods and good moods.
ok i just came acrost this site while searching for better sex postisions and stuff….ill start off by saying im 20 and my girlfriend is almost 18 i lost my virginity when i was 15(the summer before high school) i have been verry sexualy active with a number of different girls. 4 of wich were virgins, including my current girlfirend of 2 years. with my gf it was her first time but like i siad i have a LOT of experence, we used a condom and a lot of lube and she said i hurt but not bad enough to stop. foreplay is the key everytime but expecialy you and your partner ‘get the hang of it” she has been on birth controle ofr a year and a half and her period only lasts 2 -3 days and no more condoms lol
talking about the bleeding, the first girl i had sex with (also a virgin) blead a lot the second time we did it it realey scared us and back then(5 years ago) there wernt any sites like this. the other girls blead a little afterwords but nothin serious…..i dont think at least
btw my gfs birthday is next month and im getting her an engagment ring for her 18th birthday.
OMG!!!! i love this website!!!!! me an dmy boyfriend are 13!!!!! but we have been to gether 4 like more than 4 months!!!! and we are so ready 2 have sex!! i really want it an dso dose he but ny friends say that its stupid but hey im in love with the guy!!!! and he loves me 2! i think that we r gonna wait till our 5 month anneversery!!!! that way it will be special!!! shou;d i do it????? i love the advise!!! it helps ALOT!!! and it calmed me down alittle!!!
smexygurly, don’t do it!!! you’re way too young! have you thought about the possible outcomes of having sex?? are you ready to get reagnant? you’re still a child so enjoy your time being one. Don’t rush sex…you might end up regretting it! For you benefit, don’t do it! I mean, 4 months and you’re already in love? PLEASE! You don’t know what you’re talking about. I advise you, don’t do it.
i agree, dont do it your still a kid, and honstley dont know what love is. wait a while if your realey in love sex can wait.
My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 years now and we are both virgins. Last night we tried having sex for the first time, but it wasn’t that great. We didn’t have a problem getting him hard, but keeping him hard for more than 2 minutes was the main concern. Is there a way to keep an erection sustained? Are the other factors that might contribute to this? During oral sex he remains hard and everything is just fine. Could it be pressure or a lack of self-confidence that could be causing this issue?
Thanks,
RandomTradeMark
i am 18 and i think i am ready to have sex with my boyfriend(we have been going out for 5 months) i am a virgin and he isnt but has only had sex with one other girl…am i too young? is it too soon? the big thing is i don’t LOVE him but i do care for him a lot…also do i need to go on the pill?
I THINK THAT HAVING SEX 4 THE FIRST TIME IS SPECIAL AND PEOPLE MUST BE READY FOR IT.
MY FIRST TIME WAS PAINFUL AT FIRST AS WE CONTINUED IT BECOME ENJOYEBLE AND I WANTED TO SCREAM HIS NAME SO THAT EVERYONE CAN HEAR HOW SPECIAL HE IS TO ME AND I LOVED HIM FOREVER SINCE THAT DAY EVEN IF WE BROKE UP RECENTLY AND I WILL ALWAYS LUV HIM HE WAS MY FIRST AND HE TAUGHT ME A LOT.
Well lets see, my birthday is coming up on the 4th of July and me and my bf are thinking about doing it and of course Im nervous as ever because im worried about becoming pregnant, but I want to. I just need advice, any at all, would be greatly appreciated. Thanks
uhmm im 14 & ive been going out with my bf for 2 weeks how can i get him to try me ?? pop the cherry seed
uh…desiree? your 14 and you’ve been going out with him for two weeks. im nearly 16 im a guy and ive been going out with my girlfriend for a year and we dont even think its time yet. id wait if i were you. you might regret it.
My girlfriend and I are both 15 and have been together for 6months. (Liked each other for 3 years hehe) This is my first time but not hers.
I respect woman with everything i got.
If i go slow is there a chance i will last longer or does the rhythm Really matter to a guys orgasm.
I heard if you think about something else during sex and try to zone out then you will last longer is this true??
Im 17 (male), im still a virgin, and i never had a real gf before.
Man, I feel like a looser…
I had sex for the first time today and it was nice just set the mood and be comfortable with your partner and everything should go well.
for males : Try to be on top at first But if your girl is experienced and she wants to be on top let her its a TRIP
Females: Be on the bottom the first time no mater what and if you want you man to go slower just ask and dont be afraid. The guy wants you to be happy.
_
hello i am going to have sex to nite and reading your description of it sounds ok i thought it would hurt quite a bit and getting sort of worried about it nut after reading that it sounds like it doesnt hurt that much. any way thank you for the advice am going to have a better night then i expected thanks bye
“uh…desiree? your 14 and you’ve been going out with him for two weeks. im nearly 16 im a guy and ive been going out with my girlfriend for a year and we dont even think its time yet. id wait if i were you. you might regret it.”
Don’t be an idiot..I lost mine at 12 and broke up with the girl couple of weeks after..I don’t regret it. Better doing it the first time with someone you don’t love, because with someone who you do love, you’ll know what to do.
im not stupid. i know that. just because you lost it at twelve and dont regret it., doesnt mean anyone else wont. people are different. i was just saying what id do if i were in her situation. its entirely up to her to do as she pleases.
my point was shes only been going out with him for two weeks.
morally this doenst sound that great but im going to lose my virginity soon to this very expierienced guy who im not going out with. I dont love him either but am comfortable with him and really want to (im 17 btw) but i just hope i am “good”enough and give him a good expierience as well as my own.anyone have any advice or suggestions?
Laur, If he is experienced then thats great but to me it screams that he has some issues, STD’s, I think that your physical desire is great but dont do it if you dont love him. That will come back to you and make it harder in the future. I know this may seem weird but try taking care of yourself. That way its 100% safe for you and you dont have to have a emotional tie to someone you dont love.
WELL i HAVE THiS FRiEND, AND SHE TOLD ME THAT SHES HAD SEX WiTH HER BF 4 TiMES THE FiRST TiME SHE BLEED.. THE 2ND AND 3RD TiME SHE DiDNT. BUT THE 4TH TiME SHE DiD.. WHAT DOES THAT MEAN??
Hi im 16 yrs old and a virgin
ive been meeting casucaly with my ex boyfriend for a while (i broke of the relashionship by the way ) ,just kissing and stuff.
However, he has said he wants to have sex with me. (He isnt a virgin),and i dont know what to do.
I havent seen him for a bit becauae hes been busy working, and in his band and going to his youth group meetings.
To be honest i still dont know what to do.
I dont feel ready, but i do really love him ,im just worried ill really regret it.
Plus i dont feel very comfortable for it and have a lot of worries about it.
He said that i need to prove i love him. although im not convinced sex and love are the same thing.
Please help me someone!! PLEASE!
i told him that i wanted to wait a while and he seemed ok with it, but PLEASE HELP ME IM WORRIED HERE.
THANKS
TA RAA X
sex is cool to do
that as maybe but its just so confusing
i stil dont understatnd wot ur expected to do and stuff…
the sort of things they dont tell u in sex ed lessons…
also does sex hurt the first time?
x
my and my girlfriend are planning on having sex its my first time but she has done it before have you any tips for me? and does it hurt the first time for men? thanks
hi there i am raza and i am 24 years old all i have read and gained a lot depends on religious lessons too if any one intrested in sex can contact me frequently on my email muhammadraza22junecancer@yahoo.com i have no experience ever yet but intrested and want to have estimate my power.and i love to made friends prefferable girls bec i like beauty and rose petals well i am broadminded positive person.
Rebecca on June 8th, 2008 11:44 am TA RAA X
this sort of love is useless these loves changes with passiage of wimt time being so dont be serious in yr friends LOVE IS ONLY which u r doing love with humanity love with pure honest sencear care taking wife love with parents childrens love with nature beauty and sensetivity is every things hope u got my point of view …………i want to have sex experience honestly speaking and fond to do that to feel but not with flirt type or to ruin or to spoil some ones life thats not the way …….if any one come to me understands and want to have great experience with her own desire then i will full fill her desire ……
Hi there, me and my boyfriend has done it many time, but everytime it still hurts. Over a 3 month period we have done it about 16 more or less times. It still hurts when he goes in. Is there maybe something wrong with me or him? Please help
hi i’m rissa and and i’m 22 years old i’ve been dating this guy for like over half a year and we did it for the first time about five days ago. it was my first time but i never told him just because…..well because he never asked, he just kind of assumed i wasn’t cause he sure as hell wasn’t. anyway when we were done he went to take the condom off and noticed there was blood on it, he asked me if i was on my period and i said no why? the he said because there was blood on the condom then i told him that that was my first time and he was all oh shit oh shit OH SHIT! and i was all what? the he said i gotta go and put on his pants and grabbed the rest of his clothes and walked out the door. he’s kind of been avoiding me ever since and won’t return my calls. i don’t get it…why is he so freaked about it? any ideas would be a real help!
hi there,am a 18 yr old virgin and is dating this guy for 3mouths now,me and him have been talking about having it his more experienced .but the thing is iam rilllyyy scared .wat can i do to leasen the pain
i heard that if you masterbate like putting fingers inside- it doesnt hurt as much- is that true? and that if u use tampons- ur less likely to bleed-
i have never done that and my boyfriend and i are planning to have sex soon- and i’m worried that it will bleed and that it might be a hurtful experience.-
should i start using tampons- ? is there any ways to prevent or alleviate the bleeding and the pain?
okay this site really helps..but im 13 and i think im ready to do it with this amazing guy.but im a little scared and hes had sex before. and im scared he might go out of control. and im scared because i dont know if it will be really painful for me and im scared. and he said that he wont go anymore if i want him to stop. and i dont know if i should have sex with him at this age or wait till im older?
hai monica in think i would advice you to wait tilll you a bit older
I’m 20, and my girlfriend is 14. We have been going out for about 3 months now, and we’re thinking about having sex soon.
the thing is, i’m a virgin. she’s been with 3 other guys, and is a lot more experienced than me.
Also, i’m worried about police involvement, anyone got any ideas?
Steve-
mate id wait til shes at least sixteen, given what some parents are like they’d more than likely get the police involved. also =] dont rush things, it good to take time. i hope this helps
Anon
Hey, 17yr old guy here
I’ve had sex twice before.
First time with my gf who was a virgin, i think it went well for the first time, it was hard to (find the way in) lol so she guided me
Then another time but i was really drunk.
But the other nite i tried doing it with this girl i’m really starting to like.
And well she was a virgin and pretty inexpierenced. She didn’t like trying to “guide” me in, like i was used to.
So it was up to me to try to get it in the right spot.
And wow it was a little trickyier than i expected.
It took me several tries to get it in the right spot but i only got it there several times and then lost it.
I guess my main question here is how exactly is the best way to find the right spot in her vagina to stick it in.
Lol very stupid, immature question but i struggled with it pretty bad last nite.
Any feedback/help is greatly appreciated.
Thanks much
-John
Me and my boyfriend have been seeing each other for a while were both 13 and virgins. I was wondering if it would be better to do oral first .. ????
I dont know what to excpect on my first time i’ve read things that say dont rush only do it when your ready and we are ready! And some people have said it hurts , does it honestly??. We have talked about it so we are both comfotable and when its going to happen - next week. Im just worried that if im not good enough , do something wrong then he wil dump me im also worried abouut what if he cant get it up?
please help!
hey
im 15 and my boyfriend is 18
wev been going out for 2 weeks but we have known eachother for about 5 months
I find it incredible becasue our relationship is sooo strong.
The problem is that I am leaving the country in 1 week. We have talked openly about sex and he has told me about his first time and it was with a girl he almost didnt know. He said it sucked and that he didnt feel anything and that he left before he could finish. We have a lot of trust with each other and i tell him everything thats on my mind. I just feel so special when I am with him and he makes me feel like a QUEEn on earth. I seriously am falling in love with him and he told me the same. My friends have told me that im falling for him. The thing is that I really think and im hinting that somthing is going to happen, such as sex, in the upcomming week. I spend every day with him and every hour possible wtih him. He has told me that he buys really expensive condoms with spermedia or something like that, whcih kill sperm that come in contact with the condom. He also has told me that it would be nice if once we could sleep over at eachothers houses. He is indrectly giving me hints. What do you guys think i should do? I really like this guy and i am leaving in a week from the country. I really think i love him, and love is strong. I think i would be ready in a way because i wear tampons and i am really good at dancing which means i have moves.hahah just kidding. Can u guys please help me? What should I do ?
im 19 and my bf is 21. we’ve been going out for a year and a half and we have tried to have sex in the last couple months, but have failed miserably. we are both virgins and dont know what we are doing. we try foreplay but he just doesnt know how to turn me on… i try telling him how to do tings, but he forgets the next time we try.
then when he tries to go inside me, he barely gets the tip in and it hurts. i know its because im not aroused enough and im a bit tense. but i want it to happen no matter the pain!!! i need help on what to do for my first time!!! along with my bf, and what he needs to do to me.. email me at glowinambers@aol.com plz for advice
im 14 and im about to have sex wit this girl on friday, i dont really know her but shes hot and shes digging me and she says she wants it but is there anyway i could do it without hurting her???
I need some advice big time, my fiance and i Try to have sex, but it is just to painful for her. Lots of foreplay, lots of lubrication, but she can’t do anything, which is frustrating for us both. Any ideas?
Hello, My boyfriend and I have been together for almost four years and we both have never had sex. Im kinda scared to because I have heard all the story’s about it hurting and I may bleed and all that crap. Plus both of us are in college and we really want to finish school and have a career set before we do just in case I get preggo. Also I was taught growing up that sex was suppose to be special and should be only shared between you and your husband, but I really dont believe in that. I believe that if you are in love then it should happen if both of you are ready, but then again I would love to wait until Im married because it would be a great experience ya know. NE WAY I didnt know that alot of people have already had sex. I mean Im 20 and havent had sex but there are 14, and 16 year olds having sex. I wasnt even thinking about boys really when I was 14. Maybe at 16, but I didnt want to have sex with them. I just want to have a boyfriend like everyone else. You know someone to hold hands with and hug and kiss, really just be my friend. Its so crazy how time has changed. WEll Im sorry I just rambled on and on but I thought I would say how I felt…
okay…this website is great..
ive read every comment so far.
but i still have thee same questions as everyone else.
im 16 years oldd and im really small i weigh about 80 lbs.
me and my boyfriend are ready to have sex but im really nervous.
whats the probability of the 1st time hurting/bleeding.?
we’ve been through the whole foreplay “feel up” thing.
but i chickened out before i could go through with it
i wanna do it…but whenever the time comes i get nervous about thee pain and the bleeding…
email me your advicee! please ! x0ballinbaby050x@aol.com
I’m an eighteen year old virgin and I’ve been seeing a 19 year old non-virgin for almost a year and a half. We’ve come close a couple of time to having sex, but I’ve always sort of wondered about the whole process and what happens afterwards, I’ve just been freaked out with the idea of asking my mom or someone else.
This is a GREAT website! I am so glad this is here, because all they talk about in school is abstinence, AIDS, abstinence, STD’s, pregnancy, and abstinence.
Thanks AskStudent.com for putting this together!
I’m 22.. And just had sex for the first time 2 days ago with a guy I’d only met awhile ago and only got to know better recently(in the past week)..
I told him that I was still a virgin and he pretty much guided me through the whole process, which was great, because even though it did hurt a bit at first, I gradually got used to it and then it just stopped hurting.. I didn’t come though, but as I’ve been reading, that is to be expected.. Heh..
This is a pretty cool site. It’s been interesting reading all the comments.
Now it’s your turn to guide your guy to please you the way you desire. It’s all about educating your partner to your body.
im 18 and so is my bf. but im a virgin and hes not… he told me that when we do have sex that he wants to pop my cherry then, well i suggested that we pop it before so it wouldnt hurt that much. plus it would be cleaner. he told me that he would be really careful but hes so big and im afraid that it will hurt to bad. and i dont want him to feel useless or bad at it. also, he can only get one finger in if he fingers me and two is way out of the question….should we try lube with that first before we have sex? to you know…get me a little wider. im not scared to do it, actually hes been telling me that he doesnt want to…is that normal? it makes me feel like hes not that attracted to me….
i love him with all my heart and hes my first for everything…i just want this to be a perfect experience for both of us.
comments and suggestions back would be so much help.
Hey dani, i know im probably not much help but i want to at least try. in a certain respect although im two years younger he sounds alot like i am. i think the only reason he’s saying he doesnt want to do it is because he’s scared of hurting you. talk about it a little more before you decide and you’ll both probably feel a hell of alot better afterwards
Well, my bf and i have made some big jumps in our relationship and none of these are physical. he told me that becuase he doesnt want to is because hes afraid that i wont love him anymore. and we are planning on getting married and i dont know what it is, but everytime i talk to him about sex, he gets nervous and tells me that he wants to wait a while, but i think that we have waited long enough. its just hard to understand him…i guess he is worried because i have never had sex before
I’ve written on here before, but I never read all of the posts. I just finished reading them, and I think that having this Comment Board on here is really great. I still had some questions, and everyone answered them, which is great!
The only problem is, I still don’t know when the right time to have sex is. I guess this question is to anyone, but when is the right time to have sex and how will I know I’m ready?
That probably sounds stupid, but I just don’t know how to answer those questions.
I’m a virgin and I have a couple of strange question:
-Do you look at the guy while having sex?
-What do you do with your knees? (Weird, huh?)
-What do you do afterwards? Just cuddle, say “thank you”….what?
Hi Jil,
well im a virgin too, and i always thought that penis’ are ugly and disgusting and that i didnt want it anywhere near my vagina. well i always thought that (and this was how i was raised) that your virginity is the most amazing gift you can give to your husband/spouse. becuase it means that you trust them that much and you love them that much and you are willing to do that with them. im not saying sex is taboo, but to cathelics it sortof is. :-/
well, i thought that i was gunna be the 40 year old virgin and whatnot, until i met my current boyfriend/fiance. when we first started dating it was an amazing connection we had and still have. i knew that i wanted to have sex with him because i fully and completely trusted him and love him with all my heart. i found the right person, but the right time should be thought over with you and your partner and it should be WHAT YOU BOTH WANT. because some girls just let the guy decide and sometimes the girls arnt ready and it can drastically change the relationship.
Im studying to be a doctor and i know ALOT about the human body and the reproductive organs and i think its more then just hormonal i think that its also beyond natural instict when you have sex for the first time, i think its a concious effert as well.
so just keep in mind that sex shouldnt just be sex.
Hi, so i wouldnt say im experienced by any means. I have only ever had sex with one man. I am now 19 and he is now 23. we dated for over a year before we decided to have sex. my advice for people like dani is you def do need alot of foreplay and as a girl, you can probably even try to do it yourself, to loosen yourself up before hand, the bigger the guy is the more it is going to hurt. i would never recommend a 13-16 year old to have sex. i dont think you have enough maturity to do that and not regret it in the future. i know so many people that had sex young and regret to this day who they did it with or that they didnt wait at least a little bit. i can safely and honestly say i do not regret one single thing, i loved the man i did it with. and still do. Plus if you are still in highschool, rumors spread, and as a virgin, thats the last thing you want is all the little highschool kids spreading around how you lost your virginity to so n so. my suggestion would be to wait till you are 17-18 or at least a senior in highschool/out of highschool to take it to that level. just make sure you are careful about it and girls. i was VERY nerve wrecked about becoming pregnant and that ordeal but the more you trust the man you are with the easier you can let go and just let them take over you. hope this helps.
feel free to email me if you have any questions!!
oh this website helped heaps i had my first time like a couple of hours ago and now i undrstand i freaked out though i mena i hurt when he inserted me but after a while it was pleasureous we did it for ages all theanks you
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