How To Piss People Off

1. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies

2. In the memo field of all your checks, write “for sexual favors.”

3. Specify that your drive-through order is “TO-GO.”

4. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.

This is soo funny. Something tells us that nobody speaks English here.  Looks like Asian folks just think written English looks cool, and since most of ‘em can’t read it any more than you can read Japanese — well, you end up with some pretty funny t-shirts. The best part, the oblivious teacher and more little kids in the background.

Wonder how he got it though. If you observe, it is not an over sized shirt and is clearly made for a kid.

or… this kid is a crazy pimp

or.. a fan of Dead Kennedys. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Too_Drunk_to_Fuck

College CafeteriaDo you hate the food at your College Cafeteria? Ever wished that after obtaining your food, you proceed to throw it out the nearest window and turn to the person nearest to you and say, “Wow! Did you ever see [name of dish] fly like that before?”

Following is a top 10 list of the number of ways you can add confusion to a college cafeteria.

1. Hide behind the milk dispenser. Moo every time someone gets milk.

2. Stand in line for the food. After getting your food, smear it over your clothes and return to the end of the line. Repeat.

3. Instead of getting a fork, knife, and spoon, get three spoons. Cut your meat with them and pretend not to notice.

4. Do not to use glasses. Anytime you feel like having a drink, go up to the liquid dispenser, wrap your mouth around it, and press the button. Complain that it goes too fast.

The following gives the top 10 dating rules for College

1. In an imaginary world a kiss would signify the end of sexual tension and the beginning of a relationship. In college, it means somebody’s horny.

2. In an imaginary world, “I really like spending time with you,” and “you’re cool,” mean I REALLY like spending time with you and you ARE cool. In college, it means “will you fuck me?”

3. In an imaginary world, holding hands is the first sign of true love, in college it means someone is too drunk to stand on their own.

facebook busts an internI knew that FaceBook was used by recruiters and managers to check up on their potential college hires. Apparently, the “checking” doesn’t stop after their hire. Valleywag is reporting this story on this Bank Intern named Kevin Colvin, interning for Anglo Irish Bank’s North American branch.

So Kevin has this Halloween party to go to and emails his manager that he has some family emergency in New York. He is having a good time and keeping his FaceBook profile updated with the latest pictures taken from the Halloween party. Guess what … the manager or someone in his team was checking up on FaceBook and ping… Kevin added new pictures pops up.

The intern’s manager replies back to Kevin with a picture attached from his Facebook profile … partying and copies his entire team on it.

Moral of the story fellas: Keep that FaceBook current status blank or turn it off.